Should you let your teen holiday with friends?
| Published: 3rd July 2008 21:45 |
Teens on holiday with friends
With summer upon us, a regular dilemma faced by parents contacting the Parentline Plus charity is whether or not to allow older teens go on holiday on their own for the first time.
Teenagers may well want to go on holiday with friends or a boyfriend or girlfriend rather than with their family, especially if their friends are allowed to go away on their own, but it's not easy making this decision.
National charity Parentline Plus, which operates a free, confidential 24-hour Parentline 0808 800 2222, answers over 100,000 calls and emails a year, with some 47% from parents of teenagers. The charity offers parent-to-parent support, and based on feedback from parents calling the Parentline or attending its parenting groups, it has put together some tips for parents facing this dilemma (a full list of tips is on our website for parents http://www.parentlineplus.org.uk/index.php?id=473
Lucy Edington, Acting Chief Executive of Parentline Plus, said: "It's tough when you are faced with making a decision on whether or not your child should be allowed to go on holiday without you! It can bring real mixed emotions, given that they want to break away from you but you want them to be safe. You have to make a decision based on your child, and not be swayed by pressure, as teens mature at different rates and so what might be appropriate for one family may not be for another.
"Our strength here at Parentline Plus is that we are able to offer parent-to-parent support and, based on feedback from parents calling our Parentline or attending our parenting groups, we have put together some useful pointers to think about before having this discussion with their teenager."
Major worries for parents in this situation are the dangers of alcohol and drugs and the risk of holiday romances and unprotected sex. Thousands of parents contact Parentline Plus, which is the biggest independent provider of parent support in the country, about these issues every year. Parentline Plus provides tips on how parents can talk to their children about sex, relationships and responsibilities to help keep them safe.
If your teen is under 16, many resorts and campsites will not take bookings from unaccompanied under 16-year-olds. So this can be helpful in putting an end to discussions. There are however alternatives such as organised holidays which tend to be activity or camping holidays with responsible adults to watch out for them.
The charity's leaflet ‘The Real Picture' provides a wealth of information to help parents keep their teenagers safe and highlights issues from having safer sex to drugs and drink - this can be downloaded from the website or ordered via Parentline 0808 800 2222.
Tips on teenagers alone on holiday:
- Talk openly about what you see as the potential dangers in a practical way so that they don't tune out.
- Don't over focus on anxieties and concerns - remember it is supposed to be fun for them.
- Make contact with their friends' parents so that you can share contact details and information.
- Ensure they have credit on their mobile phones and that they are charged and make a deal with them to text you every couple of days (check with the phone company that this is possible if holidaying abroad).
- If they meet someone and have a holiday romance, remind them of making safe decisions when it comes to having sex. Talk about choices and contraception.
- Make them aware of drinks being spiked and not putting themselves in vulnerable situations. Remind them of safety in pairs.
- Ensure they have access to a bank account or emergency money, e.g. in case they need to pay for healthcare upfront abroad.
- Get informed and talk about drugs, especially if they are likely to go to a club.
- Talk about drinking alcohol in moderation, especially when mixed with the hot sun.
- Expect to wake up in the night worrying and hoping they are OK - this is normal!
- For more tips, including advice for travelling abroad visit the Parentline Plus website at www.parentlineplus.org.uk
Parentline 0808 800 22 22
e-mail parentsupport@parentlineplus.org.uk
source: www.parentlineplus.org.uk
